Relationships: Is Sleep Deeper Than You Think?
Updated: Jun 8, 2019
I may be about to connect some pretty strong dots for your life and your personal relationships. However, this entire piece needs to be prefaced first. Keep in mind what you are about to read is a loose analysis of many connection points: some speculation based on his personal insights and experiences of seeking truth and not being afraid of what I find.
The Revealed Secrets of Relationships and Sleep
In our personal relationships with our significant others, why does it feel wonderful in the first few months or years, when at a later point, drama comes out of nowheresville to sabotage a "possible" past amazing and wonderful thing? This timeless question may finally be answered in this blog. Excited to know a likely answer? Yes, excitement is a typical human emotion and it is fascinating.
The first starting point comes from Dr. Bruce Lipton's ideas about how to reprogram the subconscious human mind and an embedded link in his idea about a strategy that can be done to help restructure the parts we believe need a'fixin'. It is theorized that the Human waking mind's desires make up about 5% of the formula for the human, while the past neurological patterning makes up the other 95% in the subconscious mind. If we truly have only about 5% over our desires, that can troll our worlds if we are not not mindful and awake (joke intended) to explore our own patterning and what had been created. Past traumas might have been seeded deeper down into the subconscious, and they could be taking over and influencing our daily lives without understanding how we tick emotionally and what patterns had been coded there.
The Amygdala is the part of the brain of interest that controls our responses, emotional patterning, and so forth, "Conditions such as anxiety, autism, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and phobias are suspected of being linked to abnormal functioning of the amygdala, owing to damage, developmental problems, or neurotransmitter imbalance. "
When thinking about to access the Human subconscious, you probably have a good idea it can be done by sleeping. But do you know why? Our brains resonate at various frequencies throughout the day depending on our sleeping or waking states, what we are exposed to, what we put our eyeballs in-front of, if we are under natural lighting or artificial, what compounds are interacting there, what our diets look like, what is missing from our diets, our oxidative stress status, our environmental exposures to other frequencies in them (nnEMF) and so forth. I want to delve for one moment into nnEMFs and other compound sources like Polysorbates 20/40/60/80 that have the ability to open the BBB (Blood Brain Barrier).
"Taken together, these results demonstrated that exposure to 900 MHz EMF radiation for 28 days can significantly impair spatial memory and damage BBB permeability in rat by activating the mkp-1/ERK pathway."
But not just open and close the BBB quickly, but let's say a person sleeps in an electric or magnetic field all night due to a simple source like wires near the bed is close to the wiring in the walls, or a smart meter or circuit breaker panel on the back of that wall, or even a bed that plugs in to make it so darn "smart." Science suggests that it may take hours or even a day or longer for the BBB to close back up again in many rodent experiments! Having more oxidative stress as a result for longer time-frames with other synergies such as pathogens, heavy metals like aluminum, lead and mercury, glyphosate, etc., we have at least some of the problems about our moods and emotions summed up with the artificial synergies in our modern world.
I hypothesize that any source that can make the BBB more permeable, like nnEMF exposures, is arguably a VERY important consideration in the onset of neurological problems and therefore this past list of neurotransmitter issues we are seeing in this day. Also, we can easily theorize that this has been going on since about the 1840s, YES ABOUT 180 years now, in many population densities where Telegraph and Electrical lines have been put into our infrastructure. There was an older condition known as Neurasthenia that was phased out in the later 1800s because of Freud's work to not make the connection of exposures to the Telegraph and Powerlines at that time.
This blog is designed to help merging together several scientific disciplines, so our scientists that haven't been connecting the dots for over a Century can finally do so. So how does this all work in the mind? We have to consider frequencies of the brain and what they specifically resonate at. This image helps to show what's going on:
Any experienced anesthesiologist will know immediately what I am driving at. They work with anesthetics to lower the brain rates of their patients to help deal with the trauma of that event.
At various cycles throughout the day, and even with certain responses in our waking state, our minds have the ability to resonate at various frequencies within the specific compartments of the brain. Circadian rhythms are probably the major controller with sunlight frequencies: the importance to receive them earlier in the morning as well as block artificial lighting in the evening and sleeping in the dark.
The Pineal and Frontal Lobes are also of higher interest, and how the brain itself is interlaced and woven together may help to know how suggestible or not a person is to an idea at a certain, given moment. We need to start thinking more about how certain hormone flows and biological chemicals influence frequency rates, and where, inside of the brain compartments. We also are wise to think about how the heart and other organs resonate as well and what could be longer issues if they are not optimal, or suddenly struck by a stress of life that throws us for a loop.
Have you ever wondered why Carrie Fisher's mother passed from this world the day after her daughter died on that airplane? Could it be the heart and brain frequencies she had in common with her daughter? Do you realize that emotions are electro-chemical events? We've all heard stories about those super-in-love that tragically die within days or even hours of his or her partner's death. We are starting to delve into many of the mysteries of life with possible connections to our environments, including the living beings, as part of our environments as well.
If you believe hypnosis is not a real thing, it is, but not in the way you believe. Most people believe this half-truth:
We also must be very cautious how intentions are seeded, as mentioned here, "Anyone who thinks hypnosis is harmless might do well to remember that Hitler studied it after being cured by a hypnotist of the hysterical blindness that he suffered at the end of the First World War. His personality changed at that point as the result of a strong suggestion given in trance by a psychologist who told him that he was special and that he had great personal powers and that, with these great powers, he could cure himself of the blindness. This acted as a post hypnotic suggestion and Hitler went on to induce receptive trance states in vast crowds at rallies, bombarding them with emotionally arousing nominalisations. He even adopted a stylised form of arm levitation as the Nazi salute."
Okay, you waited for it, so I'll start letting you know why your significant other is a jerk or why you have come to view him this way, and how you cannot feel that lover's heart anymore. This gets pretty weird pretty fast, but I think you'll see how we work as humans in a whole new light. As humans are humans, their emotions are quite needed to create their societies for making special bonds with others. Disconnecting from other people may be needed in special times to go inward and explore our natures to fix what may be going on.
As you read above from Bruce Lipton's website, we have to take personal action to do this, and when our closer friends and loved-ones are too close and ground in the person's space, it's very difficult to get to a space to disconnect enough to discover what patterns and behavior TRIGGERS were involved years or decades ago when we were children.
Side-bit Cell Phones: Do you have too much of a problem disconnecting from your cell phone? When we have our cell phone in our pockets, we don't have a bond with that phone itself per se, other than the tactile feel of it. The person gets a series of dopamine rushes for neurological hits via the blue-light pulsed frequencies from the screen to help drive a person to use the device habitually. And the habitual cell phone user will be sending out the message of DISCONNECTING TO EVERYONE ELSE while they connect to their devices.
Okay, back to Humans again. During a child's upbringing, children develop in different ways due to their sleep patterning and dreams, and possibly what they perceive in their environments during their lower frequencies that feeds the base of the brain and the subconsciousness. As a human falls to sleep, the Hertz falls down from a higher frequency to a lower one in many of the parts of the brains and the organs. Everyone knows the heart-rate also slows, etc.
This is all related to the DC Current and our Electrical organ systems. The reason why this is not well-known throughout society at this time, is the real illusion painted by medical communities, industries and governments, that the human body is ONLY BIOCHEMICAL when in-fact, the biophysics (light and energy) that drive these processes. The very fact you just read that last sentence should be a wake-up call that you were able to understand the words because your brain's design is electrical, not biochemical. EEGs and EKGs make it even more obvious that they are detecting electrical impulses from your heart and brain.
Relationship Attachment Styles
Now let's get to the Heart of the problem. Read this article first to get a background about relationships and how we basically "tick" having one of three personality types on a sliding scale from Anxious to Stable to Avoidant. Myster Spock has outlined the general idea about how Humans respond to situations, and this is a major facet of the Subconscious, but also in part the Conscious mind as well that can be used as a check-sum against past patterning:
Anxious Style: (under-secure) Craves more closeness & love over seeking independence; may feel more loss and concoct imaginary, negative scenarios attempting to figure out another's avoidance of communication or actions.
Avoidant Style: (over-secure) Craves more personal independence and prioritizes it over seeking closeness & love; often represses or hides love deep within and may have a harder time connecting to people.
Stable Style: a good mix and/or can recognize the needs of another in all cases and doesn't diminish love or independence.
Moreover, the Anxious just craves to be closer, more affection, etc. and bonding and my feel unloved a bit more easily. The Avoidant feels that the Anxious partner may, over time, become "more needy" and not delegate enough control over things, situations and events as the relationship as it goes on. And the Avoidant type may be totally correct about the behaviors of the Anxious Type.
This feedback loop can promote a lack of trust over time whittles things down, and sometimes out of nowhere, especially if the partners are not sharing their innermost thoughts enough, often due to a lack of time and the continual stresses in this modern world, the couple starts to believe the other doesn't care enough, starts resenting a partner more, etc., etc., etc. Humans. Forgiveness must be part of the strategy as well: self-forgiveness and honesty to know what's inside.
Here is the key though. Sleep and other sources of conditioning that may be happening in a lower-frequency state.I hypothesize that as a Human goes to sleep every night throughout his or her youth, the sleeping situation itself can present the case for how "secure" a person feels during the sleeping period when dozing off. One can imagine that as we fall into a deeper sleep at night, we don't like to hear rattling or disturbances going on. If we fall to sleep to some type of conditioning like music that suggests anxiousness, this programming could sabotage things later when an Anxious person isn't having needs met. Our eyes are closed off with eyelids and then we go off into dreamland, where secure or terrifying dreams and also suggest how we behave in our waking world days, months or years later.
We are all vulnerable to suggestion, and we must be even more careful in this technology, marketed-driven world around us. This his how hypnotism, anesthetics, sleep and light frequencies all influence the brain's electrical systems, the frequencies generated there and the fields that come off of them: Electromagnetic Fields. These natural fields that radiate around the human body also interact with other humans. One could argue that the birthing "skintime" is only one element when a newborn is given to the mother. The new EMF connection from the mother's heart to the child is a real electromagnetic event, but currently, society takes this more like science-fiction and cannot yet see the impacts of it. By the way, the detection of these ULTRA-WEAK electromagnetic fields requires special machines. More can be learned about this at Heartmath.
Back to the 1:1 relationship of two partners: What's interesting is that the Avoidant Relationship Style can often perceive the closer-people in his or her life to be know-it-alls, negative, overly needy, too mushy, condescending or the like over time. The Avoidant Style might start racking up the faults of the partner into the "Grudge Dungeon" with mental checkmarks against that person if no change is seen to align to the Avoidant's world. Avoidants do this because of the desire to want to maintain control of the world and feel that they can handle things, feeling a desire to be a bit over-secure and stepping back away from another.
Sadly, this can help close-down the heart for business a bit because the choice of independence over love may be too strong of a pattern to overcome without enough work done to investigate the desire to disconnect and maintain independence. The song by Kelly Clarkson called "Miss Independent" helps to describe the Avoidant Style. The laundry list of problems can start to add up to create stress that going rogue is better than working out the problems with the partner. When willpower is weak, that may be the time the Avoidant says enough is enough and dumps the other.
For an overly Anxious Style, "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler describes the behaviors. If the lyrics are heard, you hear a lot of passion interwoven with words like, "I don't know what to do", "shadow on me", "nervous", "terrified", "lonely", "hold you tight", "always in the dark", "really need you", "nothing I can do", "restless", "a little angry," etc., but also interwoven with the need for closeness to another, or the whole world is lost. Love as a savior is a main theme to rescue the relationship. This can lead relationships to a disaster when the Anxious Style gets too strong and cannot pull back and see that love is not possessive. As humans, we can relate to to the song at times, but I believe the song shouldn't be embraced as reality for good mental health.
Keep in mind, as individuals we need to be mindful to know there are various layers, synergies, and degrees of each Style, so what was written above may only be slight or could bounce around due to the underlying neurological patterning. Many Avoidants and Anxious Styles can weave into the Stable type also, especially when both are using Nature as a tool, cycling their patterns well, getting quality sleep and food sources, and their overall energy levels are not depleted.
Let's say the Anxious Style is working on going more Stable, but the Avoidant that is with the Anxious partner likes the neurological loop to be overly-loved. This puts the Anxious in a position of less power, so it may feel like over time needs are not being met on more equal footing. But let's say the Anxious gets to a better place of balance; as a result, the Avoidant may pick up on it so much that some perceptive feeling of romance dwindles, because it's not feeding the past cycle with first relationships in adolescence or even with parents or siblings. Avoidants usually don't need to work at love much as a result of the Anxious person's pursuit and the Anxious Style person may feel, "My partner is not putting enough into this relationship."
What can be helpful for the Anxious Style is to understand the sentiment of "Hold on Loosely, but Don't Let Go" as mentioned in the song from 38 Special, so if the Anxious partner "Clings too Tightly," it will relinquish all control. The Avoidant Style needs more "Space to Breathe In." There is Self-work needed for both parties that are not Stable, but even the Stable Style may shift one way or another during a relationship as power dynamics change within it.
Love is the answer, but not too much love that is either forced or that manifests from a negative space. The Anxious Style will need to self-reflect to understand strategies for the patterning around how to cope without another. But on the flip-side, the Avoidant needs to find ways to take Leaps of Faith for love. It's very much like addressing a fear. We must confront our fears to a point to deal with them, but the Avoidant needs to confront love enough and figure out ways to allow the partner back into the heart before is goes frigid. Often the Anxious or the Avoidant may not see the complexity of the other person when Self-work has been done.
The lyrics for "Heart and Soul" by the group T'Pau shows a more balanced and self-reflective perspective about the "politics of Love" to "give a little bit of heart and soul." You can hear that the lyrics are asking, "Inside I need to know" because there has been a lack of communication leaving the partner to "create a mental chatter guessing game" about what may be happening in the mind of the other. Instead of making assumptions, the wise partner that doesn't have enough information would keep asking questions until enough information is gained about the problem at hand to satisfy the curiosity. How we respond in our relationships may be directly related to how we experienced the first decade of our lives that paints the subconscious in the direction toward an Avoidant or Anxious Styles in their expressions. Those drivers need to be considered.
Also, it is very likely that a Human's own previous sleep patterning, due to waking up suddenly from sleep and negative images or dreams as a person falls to sleep could be a larger problem. This also may translate into more adrenal fatigue when actively living and sleeping, and combining this with our artificial-lit world filled with nnEMF, we have some strange synergies afoot:
"Anxious youth typically experience sleep-related difficulties, but little is known about the role children's coping and perceived control over anxiety may play in these relations. We examined children's perceived levels of control over external anxiety-provoking events and internal anxious emotional reactions, as well as two dispositional coping tendencies (avoidant, support-seeking), and whether these were associated with anxious children's (N = 86) presleep arousal. Low perceived control over anxiety was significantly associated with high levels of presleep arousal. For children with low perceived control, higher avoidance was associated with greater presleep arousal, whereas lower avoidance was associated with lower presleep arousal levels. Findings suggest that efforts to avoid stressful life events may contribute to presleep arousal, especially under conditions where anxious arousal seems uncontrollable."
Myster Spock believes that the ears are more of an ancient structure than the eyes, and when sleep happens, the eyes are shutdown and the ears overtake. Just like many people know how hypnosis can help, we have to be mindful to not seed the wrong thoughts. Even listening to the wrong music in some traumatic state could create some longer-term, unwanted neurological behaviors. So knowing how a person ticks and making adult decisions about being truthful regarding the Relationship Style could be a strategy to consider if both people in the relationship know they work well together. We seed thoughts all day to a point, but in that drifting-off-to-sleep-window, the Avoidant try to be open to more love over personal freedoms, just as the Anxious could, as an idea, try to practice more parasympathic approaches like embracing more natural frequencies, reducing all artificial lighting and screens at dusk, CT (Cold Thermogenesis) for better energy, eliminating adrenal stressors like caffeine sources (especially past noon) and getting a massage to reduce the stress load before drifting off so a feeling of more safety and independence could get built into the subconscious state.